August 20th-July 1st = 50 days of silence. Finally Broken. Apologies.

I'm sitting in my dad's office at our house in Maseru, Lesotho...physically 1822.72 kilometres from where I was for my last post, but a world away from who I used to be. It is incredible how much life can change in a few short weeks. Here's an attempt to catch you up on what happened after I left Malawi...I have a feeling that most of you reading this have heard from me via different ways and already know most of it. DISCLAIMER: this post will be WICKED LONG, (it’s taken me 3 days to write) I apologize if your eyes hurt at the end. Consider yourself forewarned.

July 2nd Nathan and I finally managed to get out to Nkhoma and visit with the TerHaars. It was really good to see them. The kids have grown so much! They were getting ready for Adam and David's adoption on the 9th. We went out in the Ministry of Hope van with John the driver. Nathan drove. John slept. We thought about making some cash by turning it into a matola on the way back, but would've been stopped by the police without a license...so we didn't. Nathan packed that night and we took him to the airport the next day. I hung out with the Ministry of Hope staff one last day before it was my turn to fly out the next day--July 4th. Rachel took me out to the airport nice and early in the morning and I flew from LLW to Nairobi through Lusaka. I was really excited to see the whole family and RVA friends, but it was hard saying goodbye to Rachel and to Malawi, especially because I don't know when I'll manage to get back there again. I will get back there again though--I do know that.
I got to Jomo Kenyatta Intl Airport and through customs to see Mom, Dad, Andrew, Alifa, Isaac and Jack waiting for me around 5pm. The RVA varsity rugby team was playing in the Prescott finals so Nathan had taken a taxi there as soon as they'd landed. I was SO upset that he got to be there and I didn't. We went from the airport straight to the Java House at junction, but since it was rush hour on a Friday afternoon in Nairobi it took 2 hours (Jack and I got out of the car, walked to the nearest gas station, used the choo and got back in the car before it moved). After going to Nakumatt we headed to the guesthouse where we were staying until Moses flew in the next morning. Dad went and picked him up at the airport, then came back for breakfast and we all piled in the rented van and headed out to Kijabe. We got there about 10 minutes after the alumni girls basketball game had started (For you non-RVAers, alumni weekend happens every year the weekend before graduation. The alumni--mostly from the class two years before--play against the varsity teams in all the sports). I saw SO many dear friends. It was especially good to see Jojo, 2 years was way too long to go without seeing my better half. She was playing in all the sports so I didn't get to see her really until after the games were over. Cheryl surprised me to tears when she showed up cause I didn't think she was coming--she also played all the games. Meanwhile I saw about half of the rest of my classmates, had stoney(s) :) and jr. store food, walked circuit, watched field hockey, basketball, volleyball, and rugby (Nathan got a concussion, alumni played really well). That night was alumni banquet in the tents behind the new cafeteria (which was still under construction). The food was one of my favorite cafo meals and it was fun to be with the girls and to welcome Katie and Danjella to the elite club of Rift Valley Academy alumni.
After the dinner, Jojo, Cheryl, Megan, Sarah, and I climbed up onto the woodshop roof for a bit, then just hung out by the science pond with the boys catching up on life and reminiscing about highschool. The Jazz Ensemble concert was going on at the same time and we could hear the music from outside. At the end Cheryl and I ran in to sing Mayibuye and the Hallelujah chorus with the choir and other alumni. I cried. Typically. The Class of 06 alumni continued to hang out at the science pond until late. Elise, Jojo and I went to get my stuff from where my family was staying and carry it down the hill to the Riches house. We were all fairly exhausted and semi-jetlagged so we only talked for a few hours. The next morning was church and we all met our respective families to sit with them. It was senior Sunday, and they did a great job. Afterwards the whole fam, plus some of Moses's buddies, plus some of mine who showed up and joined tables with us went to Mama Chikus for lunch. (Those of you who have never been to this fine Kenyan duka, it's worth the plane ticket and matatu fare to Kijabe--it will change your life).
Saturday had been Katie's 18th birthday, but we didn't celebrate until Sunday afternoon. She had cake, ice cream, sodas, lots of balloons (Jack made the most hilarious look of shock whenever one popped), lots of friends, and lots of presents. From there Jojo and I ran to Suswa for our reunion tea with the Manns. I only stayed for about 10 minutes before I ran down the hill to the Riches to change and then to the matatu station to catch a ride into town with a group of friends. We went to village and ate food, enjoyed tuskers, watched Hancock in the theatres and chilled around a couple of hookahs. It was late when we left so we squeezed into 2 taxis. The one I was in broke down/overheated multiple times on the way up the escarpment to the highlands so we didn't get back until midnight.
I got up extra early on Monday morning and headed to the computer lab to work on financial aid and collegeboard stuff (blech…it followed me all the way to Kenya) before watching Katie in the girls soccer game at 9. Sarah and I then managed the alumni team for the guys game. It was just like old times…and lots of fun cheering the guys on. It was the only game the alumni won (3-2). Ben scored the winning goal. We had a family picnic above upper field and then I ran down to the Riches to pack for a few days at the coast. A group of 30 or so of us, mostly class of 06 were taking the night bus down to Mombasa and spending three nights there before coming back in time for Graduation. We waited for the matatus at lower gate and arrived in Nairobi with about 4 hours to kill before the bus left. A few of us opted to go to Sarit and wander around/do some last minute shopping. We ended up being the only ones who’d booked the bus so we left earlier than planned. The ride was a whole lot faster than it had been two years earlier. A lot of the road had been resurfaced.
We got to Mombasa at 5 and watched the sunrise over the buildings while we waited for a couple of matatus to take us from the bus station to Diani Beachlets where we were staying. We got one of our cottages there at 7 and had to wait until 11 to move into the others. I was sharing 3B with Jojo, Cheryl and Sarah Pate. The next three days consisted of much sun, ocean water, walks on the beach, brief rainstorms, chai, walks to the market, cooking incredible food, taking funny pictures, discussing past, present and future, heart-to-heart talks, tears, smiles, swimming, henna, gato negro, blue bandits, new experiences, fuzzy memories, fun times, and renewed friendships. I only saw Ben from a distance while we were there because he wasn’t feeling well and mostly stayed inside. At one point on the last day there I tried to talk to him about life and how it had changed in the past year (we had stopped dating a year before), but I felt awkward and made a quick exit.
We had to leave at 5:30 on Friday morning so most of us opted to stay up all night Thursday night. On 45 minutes of sleep, Sarah and I fell asleep pretty soon after the bus got out of Mombasa. Jojo and Cheryl were across the aisle and we had lots of fun chatting taking embarrassing pictures of each other while we slept. Ben and Jon sat behind Cheryl and Jojo. Ben wasn’t doing too hot. He hadn’t shown any signs of getting better all week. He took a turn for the worse on the bus, losing feeling in his right leg and stumbling over his speech. Everyone on the bus became increasingly worried as we were in touch with his parents on the cellphone and praying the bus to Nairobi faster. It was raining when we got to Nairobi and chaos broke out as soon as the bus arrived at the depot. A few people were getting off in Nairobi and leaving from there so we had to say goodbye to them, the rest of us had to switch to another bus which was carrying on to Kijabe. Jon, Owen, and Cheryl got a taxi and rushed Ben to Nairobi hospital—by this point he couldn’t walk and had to be carried off the bus. His parents met him there.
It took the rest of us an hour just to get out of Nairobi because our bus’s transmission was shot. We were praying the whole way. Nate, Joe, and Luke took charge of distributing the food we had as we were all starving by this point (we each got one marie biscuit and a half a piece of canned pineapple). It was almost nine when we reached the Kijabe turn at the top of the hill and were met by the Riches, Nanningas, and my Dad in the van. All persons and luggage were accounted for and we headed to RVA in hopes of catching what was left of senior night. Senior night happens every year the night before graduation and the seniors go through past performances and memories before they kick all the non-seniors out so they can say goodbye to each other. We didn’t get there in time so I just went in to hug Katie and tell Jesse (Ben’s brother) what I knew and give him a hug. From there Jojo and I went to the basement of Swala where my parents were staying and had pancakes for dinner. It was almost 10 by this time. We talked about what had happened with our parents and prayed a bit and just sat there, emotionally exhausted about a lot of things. Jojo’s mom, Aunt Mathilde, walked the two of us down to the Riches where Marti, Kaari, Elise and Sarah were with Mrs. Pate. We all gathered around the kitchen table and Mrs. Pate told us that the doctors were fairly certain that Ben had had a stroke. After she left we talked and prayed for about an hour before we fell asleep physically and emotionally exhausted.
I got up early to write a few notes, and then those of us with siblings who were graduating that morning got ready and headed up to Centennial for the ceremony. It was a great service with Dr. Kraus giving a great speech about how we are LITTLE…but it’s ok because God is BIG. Then Katie was a high school graduate! Once graduation was over everyone gathered outside for the traditional pictures, including the one of whole class on the steps in front of the cafo, and one of the whole family. After the seniors had turned their gowns in, we all ate lunch in the huge new cafeteria…even though it was still under construction. That afternoon I had a couple of long conversations… everyone one leaving so it was the last chance to catch up with some people and say goodbye. I don’t know when I’ll see most of them again, so the goodbyes were important. It somehow became 5 by the time I was finished packing up all my stuff and saying my goodbyes. The rest of the family had gone into Nairobi earlier and was waiting for the Nanningas to drop me off at Nakumatt. I said goodbye to Moses and Dad in the parking lot there (they were flying out that night to the States and Germany) and we headed back to the guesthouse where we were staying. I took a taxi to village market and met up with Jon and the Lebers. Nathan was over at Wes’s house and Katie was at Jackie’s for a grad night party. We hung out at village and Jon and Owen came back to the guesthouse with me (our taxi broke down…again…we just have bad luck je pense). The next morning we all went to church and picked up Katie and Nathan there. We had lunch back at the guesthouse and watched a movie/slept. That night Nathan, Jon, Owen, and I went to the hospital to visit Ben. He didn’t look any better than he had on Friday and seemed really uncomfortable in the bed, but still had his sense of humor. We said goodbye and headed back to Village market to meet some more classmates there. We got dinner and watched kung fu panda (if you haven’t seen it, stop reading this and go watch it right now) before saying some more goodbyes and heading back to the guesthouse.
I was up at 5:30 the next morning. Mom drove me to the airport to catch the early Kenya airways flight to Johannesburg. I got in around lunch time and was picked up by the Pates. I hung out at their house and found out from them that Ben’s condition was worsening and his family had decided to med-evac him to Joburg for emergency heart surgery. It was 5ish when they dropped me off at BIMS in Joburg where the rest of the family would meet me after their South African airways flight got in. I fell asleep waiting for them and was woken up 3 hours later by the smell of McDonalds and the sounds of Jack and Isaac arguing over whose happy meal toy was whose. The next morning we all went to the mall for some shopping. The Pates told me that Ben hadn’t left for Joburg until that morning and they were going to meet him at the hospital. It was Nathan’s birthday so we celebrated by taking him to the Golden Spur for lunch.
While we were there Owen called from Kenya to tell me that Ben hadn’t made it to Joburg. I didn’t know what to say. I couldn’t say anything. As soon as I hung up I collapsed into my mom’s arms, sobbing. We talked about it with Andrew, Alifa, Isaac and Jack. It was really hard to watch them digest the news—alternating between being really sad and asking serious questions about life and death to avoiding the subject altogether and playing normally. After lunch we went back to BIMS so that Nathan and Katie could pack for their flight to the states that night. I really, really wanted to be with Sarah so my mom dropped me off at the Pates for the night after we took Nathan and Katie to the airport. My phone had run out of credit so Sarah and I walked to the grocery store looking for some…after a very unsuccessful time there we got home and found that Mr. Entwistle was there. He and Mrs. Pate had spent all day at the hospital sorting things out and he was booked on the red eye flight back to Nairobi at midnight. He was just the person that I needed to see right then. The fact that he had such comforting and encouraging words to say to me, who’d only dated his son for two and a half years while he’d lost his son of 20 years, amazes me to this day. He tried to catch up on some sleep before heading to the airport…but ended up having coffee with us instead and reminiscing about ski trips and camping and other things. Aside from the constant stream of tears from my eyes, we were all quite composed. We couldn’t be completely sad knowing that Ben was in the presence of the Most High, where there are no tears or sadness or pain. The pastor of the Pates church in Joburg came over and prayed with us and I spent a lot of time talking with Sarah and Mrs. Pate about alumni weekend, the time at the coast, the past year, our break up, and what would happen now. Sarah and I stayed up pretty late talking to friends online about what had happened and what we thought would be happening as far as the funeral…
The next morning we moved very slowly, talking more about Ben and thinking constantly of the Entwistles. My mom had promised me the day before that she would do whatever necessary to get me to the funeral. We were going to stay in Joburg until we heard where it was and could get a plane ticket, but the Baptist guesthouse was completely booked up and we couldn’t afford anyplace else. So Wednesday morning I said goodbye to the Pates and we loaded up a full car headed for home—Maseru, Lesotho. We got home at dusk and just in time, we had a flat tire as we pulled in the drive way. The next day I found out that there would be a memorial service for Ben at RVA on Friday and that the funeral would then be held the next weekend in the States. I booked a cheap two week ticket from Joburg to DC. The next four days are a blur of being home with the family, grieving, talking to friends online, and on the phone occasionally. I flew from Maseru to Joburg Monday morning and had an 11 hour layover (which I spent at the Pates house—they are wonderful and were such a blessing to have in Joburg). At midnight I flew from Joburg to Amsterdam to DC, landing at 4pm on July 22^nd (for those of you who have now lost track of what day it is). Owen had flown in from Kenya a few hours earlier and picked me up at the airport. We stayed with family friends of his that night, and of course, the first thing we did after landing in the States was go watch THE DARK KNIGHT. Heath Ledger = probably the best performance I’ve ever seen by any actor, ever. The next day, after running errands that included buying a new macbook for Owen, we headed down to my house in Marion, NC. Owen is a great roadtrip buddy so the 8 hours it ended up taking passed by without any trouble. It rained on us, which slowed us down a bit, and it was dark by the time we got there.
Dad and Katie weren’t home yet because they’d gone to Greeneville, SC to buy a used car and it had broken down on them on the way back. We made some mac ‘n’ cheese for dinner (I can’t say mac ‘n cheese without thinking of Juno’s ‘he is the cheese to my macaroni’ line. I <3>), thought about watching a movie, but fell asleep talking instead. The next morning (Thursday) we got up fairly early to drive down to Charlotte and pick up various people who were arriving there and staying at my house for the funeral, which had been set for Saturday afternoon, the 26^th. Jon Milligan was waiting for us at the airport and from there we went to the bus station to pick up Laura and Mary Iseminger who’d just spent 15 hours on the bus down from NJ. After some Arby’s for lunch we picked up Thomas, who’d bused it from Memphis (see Ben, we all love you enough to come from all corners of the world to say goodbye).
After checking out Southpark mall for a bit we decided that I’d take a car full of people back up to Marion and Owen and Jon would wait for Josh and the Solfelts to arrive. My poor little VW bug had a hard time going up the hills with five people so once we got to Montreat I traded with my dad for the church van we were borrowing for the weekend to cart everyone around. I showed Thomas, Laura and Mary a bit of Montreat and we cooled off in the creek for a bit before heading back down to the house to meet Owen, Jon and Josh. They’d opted out of waiting for Chris and his mom to arrive later that night. Dad took the whole crowd over to the No. 1 China for dinner, which was conveniently located next to a Food Lion so we could pick up some snack and breakfast food for the house. From there it was back to the house to catch up on life…aside from Jon and Owen, I hadn’t seen anyone else in 2 years. We told them about Ben’s last couple of days and attempted to stay awake until Chris and his mom arrived. They were driving up from Charlotte in a rental car and she was staying in the Hampton Inn a couple of miles away. Chris called about 1 and everyone that was still awake piled into Yoda (Owen’s car) to go pick him up.
I figured out at some point that night that Megan was flying into Raleigh and not Charlotte like I’d thought. It worked out though because Owen had to drive there the next day to pick up his girlfriend Sheryce. We were sitting around the breakfast table drinking chai when he drove off the next morning after trying unsuccessfully to convince anyone to accompany him on the 3 hour drive there. We decided to get some food and head up to Montreat and explore instead of sitting around doing nothing to enjoy the beautiful NC mountains. We bought subway sandwiches and carried them to the top of Lookout Mtn. It was a fun hike and we had a great picnic on the top. Laura carried a camera all the way up and down in her pocket, but we didn’t take any pictures! Once we got down we cooled off in the pool and attempted to keep “said pink thing” that we were playing with away from the really annoying 9 year old girls. We then headed back down the mountain to Marion and met Cheryl, who’d driven up from Columbia that afternoon.
We waited for Owen, Sheryce and Megan to get in from Raleigh before heading to a Mexican restaurant in downtown Marion for dinner. I wanted to get up the hill again to the Friday night barn dance at Montreat, but it was too late by the time we finished. Instead, we built a fire in the backyard, made some chai, ate some watermelon and took time to talk about Ben and the great memories we shared with him. I spent some time looking back through old notes we’d written, yearbooks, pictures and my end of times journal before finally going to bed. We got up early the next morning to give everyone time to shower and get ready. The funeral wasn’t until 1, but it was in Lexington a couple hours away and we wanted to get there early because we knew the church would be packed. Three cars and 17 people pulled out of the driveway by 9. We got to Lexington two hours before the service and saved the first two rows for ourselves and friends who would be joining us. From there we got directions to Wendy’s and grabbed some lunch before heading back to the church. There must have been a thousand people there. It was full. The service was beautiful. Jesse and Mr. and Mrs. Entwistle did a wonderful job with the eulogy. I started crying the minute the first song started and didn’t stop until it was over. We sang my 2 absolute favorites: In Christ Alone, and Blessed Be Your Name. Afterwards the family was in the fellowship hall greeting people. We spent a while outside enjoying a bittersweet reunion with old friends and didn’t get through to see them until 4:30 or so. I am so glad for the way people have surrounded and supported their family, and the way they have been there for each other. They are a constant example to me in their faith and love for each other.
When we finally pulled out of the parking lot at 5:30, plans had been made to go from there to the Chili’s in Winston-Salem. Our group had lost three who were leaving from Charlotte that night, but had gained a few, including Audrey (=happiness). It was Cheryl’s 21^st birthday so we made her order a Strawberry Daiquiri (which she graciously shared with everyone at the table) and sang happy birthday. A few people went their separate ways from there, but most of us headed back to Marion. It was 10:30 by the time we got back, but since it was the last night we’d all be together we decided to take advantage of the Hampton Inn pool. The boys had a great time with the lifesaving ring and a little batman basketball. Nathan cut the bottom of his foot open on a screw that was sticking out on the bottom of the pool. We stayed and played until 12:30, then said goodnight. The next morning Josh and Thomas made us French toast. Owen and Sheryce pulled out around 8 headed for Little Rock, AK. Josh and Chris were headed down to Charlotte with Chris’s mom later that morning so we said goodbye to them and went to church in Montreat. From the service in Anderson we went to Coach House for lunch with my grandparents. Thomas, Audrey, Cheryl and I then took a blanket to the grass near Lake Susan and enjoyed the beautiful sunshine and company. During that conversation, or maybe before, Cheryl, Audrey and I had spontaneously decided to dye our hair. We did it out on the deck at the house in Marion and had a great time. Thomas turned out to be quite the hairstyle perfectionist much to the surprise of all, including I think himself. We thought about dying his hair and then cutting it all off, but Walmart was closed (at 9!—shows you how big Marion is) so we couldn’t get any haircutting scissors. We went to bed fairly early that night and were up with the sun. Cheryl drove back to Columbia and dropped Audrey and Thomas off in Charlotte at the airport and bus station. I went back to sleep after they left for another five hours, then drove Katie into Asheville for some shopping with Dad.
On Tuesday I got to sleep in for the first time since I’d been in the States (Random fact about Jesse I have no idea what number I’m up to now: I LOVE SLEEP). Nathan, Katie and Dad headed up to Montreat mid-morning and I stupidly shut the door as I went out to say goodbye. Got locked out of the house for a good half hour…tried climbing through the kitchen window, but finally got into the basement. I drove to Lexington and spent the afternoon getting beaten by Michael at Wii baseball and by Jesse at real bowling. I was honored to introduce Jesse to Cookout milkshakes and spend some time talking with him and his dad, mostly about Ben but about college and life in general. From Lexington I drove down to Davidson (the weather and sunset were gorgeous and I had a blast driving in my car, radio up, windows down…the summer in America that I was sad I was missing when I left in May). First thing I did when I got there was order some Chicken fried rice from Bonsai and take it to Summit to meet Hannah and Julia. It was so good to see them, and weird to be at a fairly empty Davidson. We went to Harris Teeter and got P.S. I love you from the red box. Julia was house-sitting an awesome house in Davidson so we all snuggled on the bed to watch on the flat screen TV.
They immediately fell asleep so I was left to wake them up laughing by myself. Julia had work the next day, so we got up and went to Toast for breakfast before she had to be there. From there Hannah and I went back to the house and took a nap (like I said, I love sleep…especially when I get to share it with friends :P) before going to Summit for some chai and chatting (ooh, alliteration, haha). We aimed to leave at 12, but it was 2 before we pulled out of the Belk parking lot. I had letters to deliver and people to see…what can I say? I got stuck in traffic for an hour on I-40 on the way home—not pleasant in the bug with no AC. I didn’t need a microwave to heat up my lunch though, the leftover chicken fried rice from Bonsai. Thursday morning I took Dad to the airport to fly to Mexico for a conference, then went to hang out with the awesome Jr. Highers at Montreat (my kiddies from last summer). Friday was the pool party, last day of clubs and last big barn dance. Getting to dance the San Antonio Stroll with Lil’ Mac made my entire summer :) From there a bunch of us went to the blue cone, as always. I then headed down to the Marion house. Nathan had work the next day so he stayed with my grandparents and Katie had driven down to Charlotte to pick Moses up at the airport (he was getting back from his semester in Germany). Katie called at 11:45 to say that he’d landed ok and they were on their way. She called again at 2:30 to say that they’d broken down. I was delirious with exhaustion and would have been a danger on the road if I tried to pick them up so I told them to get a tow and call me when they got to Marion. At 5 they called from the gas station and I went and picked them up.
My aunt, uncle, and cousin were visiting from Alabama so WAY too early in the morning (11:30) my grandpa called to say they were coming down to Marion to take us out for lunch. It was painful waking Katie and Moses up but we managed and had some good country BBQ. From there we all went up the mountain. Katie and I went into Asheville and met her future Montreat college roommate, did some last minute shopping and had dinner with everyone at my grandparents. I got to hang out with Will for a bit, but didn’t get a chance to say goodbye to any other Montreat summer staffers (sorry!). It was almost midnight when I got down to Marion and thought about packing…needless to say I didn't sleep much, but I did get to talk to Rachel! The next morning we all somehow managed to make it up to Black Mountain in time for breakfast. Everybody then took me to the airport, except Nathan cause he had work. US Airlines gave me a bit of hassle about my luggage, but otherwise things were fine.
I had lunch in Charlotte, dinner and a few last chance phone calls in DC, breakfast in Paris, and got to Joburg on Monday night. My luggage didn’t come with me. The Pates picked me up (again, thank you!) and I spent the night at their house. Sarah and I talked until 4, slept until 1, created the most awesome facebook group ever online until 4, then went to the mall. The rest of my family arrived from Lesotho and picked me up at 6. From there we went to the airport and picked up my dad, who was arriving from Mexico. We spent the night at BIMS and went to get my luggage and run a few errands the next morning before driving home...for those of you who have lost track again, it’s August 6^th. I think I’ll save the past 3 weeks in Lesotho for another post.

Congratulations—you survived the longest post in the history of posts! I really do apologize about the length of this and will do my bestest to update more regularly from now on so there are no more godzilla-posts like this one. Peace and Love!